Max Hacks

There are often times I am puzzled by what goes on in the mind of a three year old. I've learned being three isn't always easy, sometimes people just don't understand you --- specifically, Max. This boy is a true bundle of joy in our lives, but that's not to say he can't be a complete pain the booty sometimes too. I'm grateful Lyla is past this phase of her adolescent development. Although the dramatics remain rampant, she is generally pretty rational and comprehends the logic in information presented to her. Then there are times with Max when I just have to laugh and remind myself that "this too shall pass." Let me enlighten you on some of his curious behavior.

As we were playing in the backyard this week, Lyla was making a wild creation using buckets of sand, water, and who knows what else. She was transporting a plastic cup full of water from the pool to the edge of the yard where the concrete meets the grass. She was minding her own business and seemingly enjoying herself. Suddenly, Max enters the scenario and insists this cup is in the way of his intended walking path. My initial response was the most obvious answer, just walk around the cup. He did not appreciate this response and I could tell a meltdown was brewing. It's moments like this when I just stare at him in disbelief for a few seconds. The insanity of throwing a fit over a cup being in your way is baffling. I gently explained the cup was there first and offered the second most reasonable option --- move the cup! I guess this made sense in his mind because he picked up the cup, moved it about a foot to the right, and continued walking. 

Max enjoys a ham and cheese sandwich a few times a week, usually cut into a shape with our dinosaur cookie cutter. However, there is a technique to follow if you wish to avoid any emotional distress. I make sure each layer of sandwich has adequate amounts of mayonnaise to ensure the layers do not fray apart as he takes bites. This is insane. My pre-parenting self would have thought someone to be completely out of their mind to be so accommodating to a three year old. But this is real life. There are some battles not worth fighting and these are the simple steps I take in order to avoid a meltdown over something as simple as a sandwich. He is similarly particular about a granola bar. If he is eating a granola bar and it breaks in half, either accidentally or intentionally, he melts into the ground over it. I've tried convincing him the bar tastes the same regardless, but he rejects that logic. At that point, I've been known to moisten the sugary fibers to "glue" the bar back together. Again, this is insane....but it's for my own protection!!!!

The last Max-ism that comes to mind is regarding his shoes, specifically shoes with laces. It took me many moons to realize Max requires the excess laces to be the same length and fall evenly over the center of the shoe. I have witnessed the walls closing in around him if his shoes are not just right. The day I finally realized what the problem was, my mind was blown. Insanity. You better believe his shoes get tied the correct [see: Max] way every single time. It's habit now. 

Maybe a three year old runs the show. Maybe we choose our battles. Maybe this is just life Max. He's lucky we love him so much!

Summer Bliss

I feel like we are floating right on through the summer, both literally and figuratively. The leisure levels in our house have peaked between the endless morning snuggles, swimming until we're soggy, and frequent trips to the snow cone shack. I can hardly remember a more carefree summer. However, over the past few days I've been yearning for the routine we once followed earlier this year. I miss attending all of our normal weekly activities. The intention of keeping up with a summer routine is tough when fun is the main priority. I've managed to keep our nap time schedule consistent, although even that is hanging on by only a thread. The best way to describe this summer is 'simple' and I guess I'm used to being more occupied than that. We are still in the midst of summer, yet the whispers of balance and consistency echo in my mind. I am looking forward to Autumn, including all the changes that come along with it.  

This brings my awareness to thinking about how much our lives will change in the next few weeks. The kiddos will begin school in August right as I begin working part time, so I am really trying to absorb as much of this complete freedom as we have left. It's hard to imagine this chapter coming to a close for us, but I am excited. The kids are excited. It will be a positive change overall. The choice to change our circumstances came a little sooner than I anticipated, but I still think it arrived right when it was meant to. I never planned on my role as a stay at home mom [SAHM] being infinite, yet I find myself reflecting back on these few years of my life that have been completely devoted to my kids. I will forever value this time of my life. It's been a huge blessing and I am so grateful we were given the opportunity to move to Texas. As tear-jerking of a decision it was, I can't imagine the emotional [& financial] hardships we would be facing in Idaho. We wouldn't have the same options as we do now, two incomes would be completely necessary. And as eager as several grandparents were to tend babies and/or help with childcare costs, I'm just not sure it would have worked out. I mean...life always works itself out...but I'm certain all sanity would be spent. 

I discovered an appreciation being a stay at home mom that I otherwise would have never known existed. It's more than I ever imagined and nothing like I expected. I could have missed out on so much. The opportunity I've had to be a mother to my children and nothing else has been so rewarding. It's expanded my ability to not sweat the small stuff, taught me patience, along with countless life lessons, and grew my heart by ten sizes. And granted, that will never change. I will continue to be a mom. My responsibilities will remain. My babies are still my babies! I'm not going to define myself any differently, but for whatever reason my brain is doing some serious preparation for it. 

I don't particularly like the way our culture divides SAHM's and working moms anyhow. The labels get tossed around like ego covered confetti and I find it incredibly annoying. The most important similarity is we all pour the same heart into our children. It's 100% from sun up to sun down. Any time spent away from our children is still spent thinking about them. It never stops, for any mom. I have witnessed the dedication among so many incredible moms with my own eyes and I try really hard not to determine the worthiness of any mother, because I know there are so many challenges no matter where you fall on the spectrum. I'll step down from the soap box now and work on finding my new happy place right in the middle of that spectrum. 

My working situation is unique and will still allow me to be readily available for my kids. The work hours and school hours are the same, so the stress of schedule conflicts will be minimal. It will still be a transition for us, but I anticipate an easy one. And surprisingly I'm not feeling anxious about any of it, with the exception of wondering what people wear to work. I know what people wear to the grocery store, park, and pool....but how in the world do people dress for work!? I can't really remember, but luckily I'm really good at shopping. I'm eager to familiarize myself with a new work atmosphere, but I'm even more excited for Lyla & Max. They are going to love the classroom environment, love making friends, and probably love a little break from me too. Ha! They are independent little people now and they are ready. 

My heart is fuller than full this summer, but I'm looking forward to dusting off the retired parts of my brain for a few hours a day. I love being with my kids, but there are some days they make this parenting thing a little too monotonous for me. [insert glass of wine here.] Yes...they still argue, claw each others faces, test their limits, and try to suck every bit of life out of me. I'm pretty sure those things will last for many years to come. But these days I'm no longer overwhelmed by two babies in diapers. I'm not obsessed with doing everything exactly just right. I'm no longer sleep deprived. I've traded in my milk factory position for a part-time referee. It's the little things that slowly change to make me realize babyhood was victorious, I survived life with a toddler, and now this preschool phase is blossoming into something pretty special. 

Happy Birthday America!

We had such a fun holiday weekend celebrating the 4th of July with family and friends. Who do I need to talk to about extending every weekend to three full days? I know quite a few people who would sign up for something like that. Regardless, I'm grateful for any additional quality time we can soak up together. 

We purchased a mildly entertaining amount of fireworks to light off for the kiddos. I determined Max as dangerously fascinated with the process, whereas Lyla was fearful enough to watch from the back seat of Olivia's car. That's the typical dynamic when it comes to those two, although I don't recall Lyla having any issue with fireworks in the past. One thing I always look forward to the most this holiday is poppers and snakes. Simple, yet classic...and completely necessary. It stirs up my favorite kind of nostalgia and it was imperative we find those two items. I have a secret stash that should get me through the next few weeks. Kirk is having a real great time making fun of me. 

We skipped out on the parade and firework show mostly due to lack of parking and the unavoidable infestation of irritating humans. I don't have any childhood attachment to those traditions in Texas which made it easier, but I think I would feel more inclined to attend such patriotic activities if they were within walking distance. Thankfully our kids are unaware these events even exist, so they didn't really get a vote. Kirk's vote was a definite no. And it's freaking hot. There's always next year, or never! 

We spent the actual holiday at home enjoying a pool extravaganza with family and friends. I think we are getting maximum usage out of our new pool this summer and it's been a real treat. We all stuffed our faces with some summertime favorites including piles of meat prepared by Grill Master Kirk, bottomless snow cones, and themed desserts. We ended our day with smores...fresh off the stove. Haha! It feels good to be an American.