Happy Halloween

Halloween is such a fun time!

 It should really happen more than once a year. 

I already decided the whole family is dressing up as zombies next year.

It's going to be faaaaaantastic!

Kirk picked out the costumes this year.

 It was only fair since he missed Lyla's first Halloween entirely.

He decided on Wonder Woman & Superman.

It wouldn't be a holiday without a little fit from the one and only sassy pants. 

Despite my efforts, the costume accessories were just too much for Lyla to handle.

Then I tried again later on. Yep. Still not happening. 

Finally Olivia was successful, only after bribing her with candy. 

We have been having Lyla practice saying 'trick or treat' over the past couple weeks 

and I was so anxious to take her out and start knocking on doors in the neighborhood.

This is a picture of the trick or treat gang.

Charli, Jeremy, & Hali didn't join our party until after dark.

Well, the first two houses: fail. 

They had bowls of candy sitting on their front porch for self service.

I mean, come on people! Who does that. 

Third house: success.

Lyla initially tried walking into their house immediately after they opened the door.

But as we progressed throughout the neighborhood she got the hang of it 

and kept proclaiming "more, more, more" after walking away from each house. 

After awhile, Hali joined us for more trick or treating and by that

time Lyla was comfortable enough to walk up to the doorstep without us.

We could even hear her saying "trick or treat" from the end of the driveway.

Once we got home, I broke my own rule and

 let Lyla completely indulge in any candy she desired.

[oops]  

Max was pretty much just along for the ride.

He seemed to be enjoying himself, but just like Lyla last year,

 he had no idea what was going on.

Happy Halloween!

And P.S. Happy 5 Months to Mr. Max.

Halloween Preview.

No costume pictures yet.

But our friend Priscilla sent us these really awesome pajamas.

Lyla's glow in the dark & she thinks that is pretty awesome.

Also, do you think Kurt is getting sick of living with us yet?

Baby Hungry. Ew.

Okay. Don't freak out.

I'm feeling baby hungry. Again? Already? What?

Do not take this as a hint that I'm pregnant or anything silly like that.

I am not a fan of my babies growing up. Max is so big already.

 I just feel like I need more time with a newborn.

I need a couple more weeks of nurturing a tiny precious little baby,

 then I will give them back to the hospital, or wherever they come from.

I'm really puzzled as to why I'm feeling this way though.

There is usually at least one child crying in this house at all times,

which induces pathetic pity-parties hosted by yours truly.

But every once in awhile I get bored and think,

I could handle one more of these! 

I enjoy a challenge. 

Then my brain screams, "Nooo! You are crazy enough!"

And I snap back to reality. 

I firmly believe one child is plenty. 

Yes. At least with one kid you can take shifts,

 but add another and you're automatically on slave duty 24/7.
Why put yourself through that kind of torture?

We intended on two only for Lyla's sake. 

Nature brought us Max a little earlier than planned,

 but he's here now and we're going to keep him around.

Motherhood truly is a wonderful thing.

But it is also so so so so demanding. 
Mentally draining. Physically exhausting. 
All my years of babysitting didn't exactly prepare me like I thought it would.
The difference in watching someone else's kids is
a. you don't blame yourself when they act like shit heads.
b. at the end of the day, you're off duty.

Why anyone would desire 3+ children is beyond my comprehension.

I mean, that woman with 19 kids or whatever? Can she even remember all their names?

Does she keep a fifth of vodka in her diaper bag at all times? 

How many black eyes has her husband suffered? 

Does she cry herself to sleep every night?

I salute you, ma'am. You are definitely going to heaven.

I can accept it if you think I'm cold hearted or selfish or any other crass names.

I probably deserve all of them for thinking this way. 

I just question how people juggle giant families without

 turning into a terrifying wicked witch.

I already get short with Lyla for no reason sometimes and

 feel completely guilty for doing so. She is too little to be annoying.

But sometimes, it just happens. And I don't like it.

So I try to just take a deep breath and remind myself that she is little. 

Three kids would certainly send me into the psychopath category. 

Plus, financially? Holy crap. No. Not possible. 

Maybe I'm writing all this nonsense after a hectic day. 

Maybe I only feel this way cause my babies are still so baby-ish & high maintenance.

Maybe other people have more patience than me.

Maybe my maternal instinct meter is broken. 

Maybe other women give into this crazy urge knowing that the

two weeks of enjoying a newborn makes the remaining 18+ years totally worth it.

All I know is someone in my life needs to start making some babies

soon to tame this undeniable hunger I have to reproduce. 

Side note: In the unlikely event I do have a third baby,

 it would be impossible not to fall in love just as I have with Lyla & Max.

I wouldn't want he/she to be permanently damaged after reading this and

think he/she's mother hated he/she before he/she was even born. 

I bet that was confusing for the he or she reading that short segment! 

Pumpkins With Our Framily

It's that time of year again! 

The time of year when I beg Kirk to carve a pumpkin with me 

and I always get rejected. But not this time. 

Sorry Kirk, but after seven Halloweens with me, you've run out of excuses.

The "Lyla's too young" logic didn't even work  like you pulled last year.

I will share our afternoon through the following photos!

Starting with Mr. Max:

"Yes mom, I am cute. But it's surprisingly chilly out here. Please get me a blanket."

"Aww, that's better."

Initially, Lyla seemed excited about the group activity. 

But once the carving started she was completely uninterested and refused to participate at all.

"Yucky" was her response to e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g.

Lyla, would you like to help? Yucky.

Do you want to scoop the guts out? Yucky.

Do you want to feel the guts in the bowl? Yucky.

Do you want to taste a seed? Yucky.

Do you want to push the knife in? Yucky.

Do you want to point to the eyes? Nose? Yucky.

Do you want to put the lid on? Yucky. 

I think this is her "yucky" face.

So, Kirk carved the pumpkin for her as he proceeded to tell me,

 "I told you she wouldn't care if we carved pumpkins or not."

Clearly Kirk is lacking the holiday spirit, but he was a good sport anyway.

Our family traditions have to start somewhere....

Next are a few pictures of Lyla, continuing to not participate.

I haven't carved a pumpkin in at least 10 years. Probably longer actually.

I saw this neato idea on Pinterest using the drill instead of a carving knife.

Well. Let's just say it was an complete and total fail.

I blame my lack of design planning and eagerness to rush.

 I can't even display a picture of the pathetic looking thing.

 It was a real disgrace of a carving.

Oh well. 

Next, I don't know if you knew this---I'm really obsessed with these two babies.

But how could I not be? Just look at them!

Kirk finished Lyla's pumpkin and she remained unimpressed.

We eventually convinced her to give the pumpkin a kiss.

After that, I think Kirk was relieved carving time was over. 

Max was clearly wiped out from the festivities too.

Arts & Crafts...Kinda.

I pretty much pushed pause on the whole finger paint deal after Max was born.

Poor Lyla. Four months without any painting. She is a deprived child. 

I'm sure she is cursing that dang little brother of hers.

Well, I'm still not quite ready to get wild with paint again.
I know the moment Lyla dips a finger in, Max will demand my full attention.

I try to avoid inviting that kind of chaos into my life. 

Anyway, I saw this idea to squirt paint into a zip lock bag.

It was a little bit lame...but at least she got to swirl the colors around. 

Just as I predicted, Max needed something. Probably my boob.

During that time the restricted finger paint activity became unamusing to Lyla.

It wouldn't take long for miss smartie pants to figure out how to open that bag.

And examples such as this is why we simply can not play with real paint, for now.

Oh, and I wanted to include a close up of the rolls.

Their growth doesn't appear to be slowing down at all and that's fine by me!

One Year Ago

It's hard to believe it's been a one whole year since Kirk got

the job offer that completely changed our lives.

It's hard to believe Lyla and I lived one whole month without him.

It's hard to believe that we didn't even know I was pregnant 

at that time and now we can't imagine life without our sweet Maxwell. 

Life is funny like that. 

Always throwing curve balls when you least expect it,

 making you doubt and question your decisions,

 and eventually leading you to the path you were always meant to be on. 

I think I'm finally comfortable with the fact that I'm really living in Texas. 

No, I am not yet considering this place home. Let's not get ahead of ourselves.

I would still rather live in Idaho than here and I still wake up
 some mornings wondering when we will move back.

I miss my family more than words can express, but I now realize

 that my new little family brings me as much happiness as I need.

 I'm still a daughter, a sister, a grand-daughter, a niece ---

but right now my most important role is being a mom.

 And it's okay to let go of the past and embrace the life I'm living now. 

One day the now will be the past and I'll probably feel a little sad when that happens too. 

That's just life though and my journey is ongoing.

I live a good life and sometimes it's easy to take the little things for granted. 

I'm a natural complainer and I just can't help it. 

But overall I am grateful for who I am. 
who I have. what I have.
where I am. and where I am going.

In other news, I have been totally slacking on baby pictures lately.
I know my kids are going to look back one day and be completely heartbroken
 when they cannot locate any photos of themselves from the first week of October 2013. 
And for that, I simply apologize! I'll strive to be a better parent tomorrow.

I assure you picture worthy moments continue to occur on a daily basis.
In the meantime, here are just a few before I went on my photo obsession hiatus....