Sappy Seasonal Change

We spent a majority of this past weekend relaxing, doing nothing spectacular. I suppose we did celebrate Starshine’s [Barbie] birthday on Saturday, which was likely pretty spectacular in Lyla’s world. We even bought balloons and decorated. Pretty silly. It was actually Kirk’s idea initially, which makes it even sillier. I don't think he planned on it going as far as it did. [insert evil laugh here.] We had fun. 

Lyla’s had her diva pants on since our return from Florida, so she has required a daily dose of nap. She can return to that no-nap lifestyle when she starts behaving like her pleasant, normal self again. And Max! I don’t even understand how it’s possible, but he grew up a whole lot during our four day separation from each other. He doesn’t seem like the same kid, he even looks older. He has a lot to say these days, despite some words still sounding like jibberish. He is a hilarious little boy. And definitely Lyla’s biggest admirer. I hope that never changes. I’m so lucky to have such beautiful, smart, funny, amazing, cute children. Is my biased showing!?

This is the first week I’m incorporating a schedule for Fall and working back into a normal routine. I feel like parenting is a lot like dieting --- you always know what you should be doing, but sometimes you get lazy and screw up. Then that little voice starts whispering phrases such as, "you're only cheating yourself..." and "you will pay in the long run..." I am a weak individual!!! The change of season is always a good time to refresh and focus on any areas we’ve been slacking. This summer has been carefree and so much fun, yet so exhausting. Who am I kidding --- life is exhausting regardless of the season! The kids both developed a bit of separation anxiety over the summer, so I’m hoping to reverse that with some frequent social interaction with other little people. We will be returning to story time at the library and we enrolled back at The Little Gym. We are super excited about that! I’m still searching for one more weekly activity for us, preferably something free. The park is always a good filler, but once it cools off we tend to visit the park several times a week anyway. As much as I enjoy keeping them busy during the week, the whole schedule thing is mostly for my own sanity. It's easier if I start my day with a game plan. If we sit home all day I usually want to destroy my eardrums and/or stab my eyes out by the time Kirk gets home. And you know misery loves company!

I worry a lot about the little things that come along with this parenting gig. I analyze and over think basically everything that happens to my kids, including decisions I have to make for them. Along with most parents, I want to provide the most fulfilling life possible for my kids, yet give them enough space to experience the consequences of life for themselves. Finding a balance can be difficult sometimes and I imagine it won’t get any easier. I read a quote recently that said, “Raise children who won't have to recover from their childhood.” That really is the most important thing and so far, I think we will be just fine. I know we have happy kids. I know they are loved. All of the other stuff will fall into place. I think back to my own childhood and can’t recall a single moment when I thought my parents didn’t know what they were doing. My parents weren’t perfect, no parent is because there is no perfect way to parent --- but as a little kid, I assumed my parents were perfect simply because they were my parents. My point is kids don’t worry like adults do.

Anyway, Moving on. It dawned on me that this is my last year without a kid in school, assuming we start Lyla in Pre-K next year as planned. I intend on finding a program for her three days a week next year, in hopes that she won’t be blindsided when she starts Kindergarten full time the following year. Anyway, once again, I’m feeling sad and nostalgic about an event that hasn’t even happened yet. I always do that! I can cry at the thought of Lyla and Max graduating high school. Why!? How!? It’s such a privilege to stay at home with my kids during these early years. We are in a really great stage and having a lot of fun. I really try to soak in all the time I have with them, even the hard days --- those days when I lack adult interaction and daydream about having a desk job. I know eventually our lives will be different than they are now. There will be a day when the only shadow that follows me around is my own. I see that day lingering in the distance. And it makes me sad. It is so important to enjoy life as it is now. 

In other news, Elsa made a live appearance at our home. I know I know --- she looks a lot like Lyla. But you better believe this girl got feisty if you messed up and called her Lyla instead of Elsa. Thank you to Aunt Taylor for the beautiful Elsa make up.  You make the people of Arendelle very proud.